MATE! Aussie Web Definitions

For those of you aboard, we don’t ride to work or school on kangaroos and no, reptiles and poisonous animals don’t rule the land – though we do have a beautiful country! (Aussie, Aussie, Aussie, Oi, Oi, Oi). Anywho, with so much web speak, online terms and IT geek speak floating around, we thought we would share a little bit of lighthearted Aussie culture with you. (courtesy of a client of ours):

• LOG ON: Adding wood to make the Barbie hotter.
• LOG OFF: Not adding any more wood to the Barbie.
• MONITOR: Keeping an eye on the Barbie.
• DOWNLOAD: Getting the firewood off the Ute.
• HARD DRIVE: Making the trip back home without any cold tinnies.
• KEYBOARD: Where you hang the Ute keys.
• WINDOW: What you shut when the weather’s cold.
• SCREEN: What you shut in the mozzie season.
• BYTE: What mozzies do.
• MEGABYTE: What Townsville mozzies do.
• CHIP: A bar snack.
• MICROCHIP: What’s left in the bag after you’ve eaten the chips.
• MODEM: What you did to the lawns.
• LAPTOP: Where the cat sleeps.
• SOFTWARE: Plastic knives & forks you get at Red Rooster.
• HARDWARE: Stainless steel knives & forks – from K-Mart.
• MOUSE: The small rodent that eats the grain in the shed.
• MAINFRAME: What holds the shed up.
• WEB: What spiders make.
• WEBSITE: Usually in the shed or under the verandah.
• SEARCH ENGINE: What you do when the Ute won’t go.
• CURSOR: What you say when the Ute won’t go.
• YAHOO: What you say when the Ute does go.
• UPGRADE:A steep hill.
• SERVER: The person at the pub who brings out the counter lunch.
• MAIL SERVER:The bloke at the pub who brings out the counter lunch.
• USER: The neighbour who keeps borrowing things.
• NETWORK: What you do when you need to repair the fishing net.
• INTERNET: Where you want the fish to go.
• NETSCAPE: What the fish do when they discover the hole in the net.
• ONLINE: Where you hang the washing.
• OFFLINE: Where the washing ends up when the pegs aren’t strong enough.